the oldest blog entry i could find in my blogging archives. some crappy site called blurty or something equally lame. i think it was from when i was about 14.

“Yes, I am a dork, so love me for it. I love school (I know it’s sad and awkward). I have a lot of homework to do for Tuesday. Vacation days rock my socks. Monday is Martin Luther King Day and I got a “snow day” on Friday, but it was really just so frickin’ cold that the school deemed it “dangerous”, which it was, I agree. Half of it was probably that the staff didn’t want to get off their lazy butts and teach the same lesson over and over again to unwilling teens. What a nightmare, haha. I was talking to my friend Judith about how substitute teaching must be the easiest job on Earth.

Things to do list for the average substitute teacher:

1.) Roll out of bed at 6 in the morning (by far the hardest part of the day).
2.) Throw on a nice outfit.
3.) Hop into the car and drive to the penitentiary.
4.) Go into the classroom with a book of passes, so you can send any misbehaving kids to the office.
5.) Tell them they have a study hall and work on whatever work you have or take a nap with your eyes open.
6.) Oh yeah, and look up every ten minutes to make sure nobody’s trying to hop out the window or making out.”

TANLINES FOR THE WIN.

my heart is growing with love and lust for leiden. on the other hand, i have become quite comfortable in time and space as it passes and changes. this is somewhere i have rarely been since my depression set in. the only way to keep my engines running was to convince myself that things will get better when _______ and even better when _______.

it's weird, but i enter a euphoric state when i am feeling any sense of artwork in my life. whether i'm making it, observing it, finding it in nature, or being overwhelmed by the juxtaposition of two colors on my bathroom wall... i feel it.
life is good at home. simple, relaxing, fun. my friends are a blast and i feel like i'm coming to find way more peace with the idea of peace, and quiet.


running is my refuge. i grow more and more addicted each day. the feeling of reaching my goal and then pushing it even further, near the point of collapse, feeling on the verge of vomitting... it sounds terrible, but it's addictive. must be the endorphins.
i'm growing my hair out. i want it to look like this:
oh yes yes, plus my hair is nearly the same colour and wavy/curly like that. probz will take another year. also, this girl is gorge. love it.





i've never been so busy during a summer. it's cray-cray. at least, i've found time to read. i'm currently reading the amazing adventures of kavalier and clay and it's amazing. i would recommend it to anyone, boy or girl. it's about a young jewish man who learns escapist techniques from a famous european musician and manages to sneak his way out of prague during world war ii via lithuania and japan, finding himself in new york city with his cousin's family. he and his cousing start up a comic book company under empire comics, while kavalier tries to use his money to get the rest of his family out of europe. he has an internal conflict of guilt dealing with the fact that he is opened to so many new and exciting experiences in new york, but feeling as though he should not be allowed to enjoy them because of the suffering his family is still going through on the other side of the ocean.


also, i saw vicky cristina barcelona and highly recommend it to ANYONE. it's life-altering. one of my favorite movies now. and the male lead is soooo sexalicious.

can't hide it anymore...

i've come to finally reveal the secret i've been hiding from the public eye for approx. five years. i am madly in love with mk and ashley olsen...
what can i say?
they're fabulous. their style is off the hook. billboard dad. and they're nearly always caught lugging around a venti starbucks cup.

old polaroids from late second semester. one of those late-night too-long study-breaks that emile and i would take. i'm beginning to miss that a lot. these ones make me feel so dreamy.
albany is so fun, i'm actually not counting down the days until school begins (like last summer). i leave wednesday evening for montreal and then to toronto, my first time in t-dot. should be fun. and many photos will be taken. :)

i just like this...

Let's live suddenly without thinking

under honest trees,
a stream
does.the brain of cleverly-crinkling
-water pursues the angry dream
of the shore. By midnight,
a moon
scratches the skin of the organised hills

an edged nothing begins to prune

let's live like the light that kills
and let's as silence,
because Whirl's after all:
(after me)love,and after you.
I occasionally feel vague how
vague i don't know tenuous Now-
spears and The Then-arrows making do
our mouths something red, something tall

- E.E. Cummings, "Let's Live Suddenly Without Thinking"